Musing on vulnerability (OR What I learned from Chris Hemsworth about Acting)

When I decided to nudge my career along a different path at the start of this year and focus more on acting than music theatre, I began to go to as many workshops as I could with Casting Directors for film & TV. As an actor, the CD can be your greatest ally or your biggest door to crack open when it comes to getting work. They’re the first step on the path to getting booked, the people in charge of collating the hundreds of people suitable for a job and culling that list down to the final few to present to the creative team. I’ve found that as a rule, they are lovely, supportive, crazily hard working people and they deserve every ounce of credit they get. 

After a few of these workshops, I started to see a trend in the feedback I was receiving-

“What a strong performance”

“You were really in control”

What I was hearing was – I was too ‘theatre’, I had planned out too much of my performance, I was too ‘in control’.

I wasn’t allowing myself to be vulnerable enough.

Vulnerability is such a great asset on screen. And I think in life, too. Vulnerability, it’s the heart of the truth of who we are. The vulnerability of you doubting something, it’s usually based around a fear of showing who you truly really are. You put on some sort of bravado or mask or something – Chris Hemsworth

giphy.gif

Vulnerability is hard! It’s hard as a person, and it’s hard as an actor. I don’t want to let down my guard and reveal anything. I definitely don’t want to admit that I have doubts about something, or if my mental state is less than great. And maybe that’s what makes vulnerability so powerful.

As a human, it can feel necessary to build up an armour to protect ourselves from anything that might try to derail us. As an actor, it’s easier to feel confident if I’ve planned out every second of the audition I’m about to give. But is it really better?

Is it better not to admit when something is hurting us, and we need help? Or to tuck away our laughter rather than expose crooked teeth, double chins, or the way a snort can sometimes sneak in? (or maybe that’s just me).

It has been terrifying for me as an actor to leave my performance open and vulnerable to what could happen -terrifying, and much, much more interesting. My performances are no longer described as ‘strong’ or ‘in control’. I’m ‘interesting’ and ‘very talented’ (this one still makes my stomach flip, thanks amazingly generous CD). I can listen and react like a real person, and weirdly, if something goes wrong that’s okay. I was open. I gave it my all. I was humanDon’t you want to try it?


Thanks for reading! Don’t forget to subscribe for updates, and if you want to see more of me, come say hello on my Instagram or Twitter, I would love to see you there!

Musing on vulnerability (OR What I learned from Chris Hemsworth about Acting)

It’s about the little things

Ever since I stumbled across the low-waste community on Instagram, it’s a concept that’s been slowly eating away at my brain. So many of the things that I took for granted before (takeaway coffee cups, plastic produce bags, on-trend clothing) are now little guilt-points on my purchase pathway.

giphy (2)

And sometimes it’s hard! There are days I wish I could just throw my food scraps into the bin without that little voice reminding me that if I just emptied my little apartment compost, I could compose them instead. And why is it so impossible to find ethical clothing in a style I actually want to wear!?

With the weather getting all gray and gloomy here, I’ve been slipping back into the habit of doing what’s easy, as opposed to what’s right (sad face). So brace yourself for a completely self-indulgent post to get myself back into the swing of things -hopefully some of you will get something from it too.

Without further ado- a list of zero waste moments that bring me joy

giphy (2)

  • French press coffee on the couch in my little apartment, where I can’t see the carpark below me but I can enjoy the wind in the trees above it. My cat likes to sit within stroking-range on the back of the couch, and it feels like the world stops for a moment
  • Eating a flaky croissant from a soft cotton bag and pretending I’m actually bustling through the streets of Paris or somewhere equally as exotic
  • Ignoring the shower walls that need scrubbing and instead focusing on the one bar of (amazing) soap, my solid shampoo, a bad-ass safety razor, and that one potplant that for some reason is happiest perched in the corner there. Yes, the walls need a wipe, but at least I don’t have to fight through a half-dozen plastic bottles to do it.
  • Coming home from the supermarket and being able to unpack everything without having to bundle a bunch of plastic together to take down to the bins.
  • Opening my pantry and seeing a sleek lineup of tidy jars, all neatly labeled and awaiting my next baking adventure

giphy.gif

…yes. It is impossible. That last point is a big ol’ lie. Despite everything the interwebs promised me, my low-waste pantry is definitely not a minimalist paradise. It’s an overflowing mess of tea, spices and at least three different jars of the same brown rice. Still, at least a girl can dream.

So what about you? Are you trying to cut down waste in your life? Or is there another habit you’ve been letting slide? I would love to hear the tactics you’re using to get back on track.


Thanks for reading! Don’t forget to subscribe for updates, and if you want to see more of me, come say hello on my Instagram or Twitter, I would love to see you there!

It’s about the little things

Wanted: Cabin in the woods

As I write this, winter is slowly creeping in on Melbourne. The trees are dropping leaves and nights are cool enough that I’m sleeping snuggled around a hot water bottle. I miss the feeling of sun soaking into my bones, and the way it lingers on the corner of my couch when I have time to sit for a morning coffee.

Maybe it’s the change of season getting the best of me, but I’m also feeling as though life is stretching me thin at the moment. I haven’t had two days in a row off in forever (at least it feels like it) and I can feel my poor body struggling to keep up with the endless balancing act of my bill paying work and the ‘work’ of building an acting career. I get a sort of tightness in my brain that makes me crave a cabin in the woods somewhere with nothing but green as far as the eye can see.

giphy (3)

My soul needs this…without the stabby stabby

Failing a cabin, what would you suggest? How do you cope when life is getting a bit much?

 


Thanks for reading! Don’t forget to subscribe for updates, and if you want to see more of me, come say hello on my Instagram or Twitter, I would love to see you there!

Wanted: Cabin in the woods